A recent trip to Disneyworld has jostled the gears in my mind and made me reflect upon this movie. The location is your hometown. The time is now. There are obese people and people teetering on the edge of fat and obese cruising around in “assisted mobility” scooters. I don’t think I’ve ever seen more assisting scooters in one place as I did in Disneyworld. Then again, I’ve been attending college for the past several years and haven’t been in too many places where people of all ages are forced to stand. Is this what the normal demographic of our nation has produced? Could my sample have been skewed? Do fat people just love Disney?
The individuals I saw on scooters can be sorted into a few categories:
1. Old and arthritic
2. Broken or injured leg people
3. Fat but no fatter than a lot of people you see walking around
4. Fat with butt hanging over the seat, needs to buy 2 airplane seats
5. Obese to the point where the belly is steering the scooter and you wonder how they were ever able to get in there in the first place
Honestly, in my opinion I would say the only people allowed to have a scooter should be 1’s, 2’s, and 5’s. And seriously, the elderly really should be at some buffet surrounded by other old people where they can enjoy each others’ company and the nostalgia of the roarin 20’s.
The other fat people described above can definitely make due without a scooter. It’s just as difficult for them to get around as it is for me. Seriously, we’re not asking them to climb a mountain – just to cross a park. I don’t want to live in a world where I scoot over to my best friend and ask, “Do you remember when we used to treasure our legs?” The fat scooter population is exercising voluntary paralysis. To drive the point home I will cite an experience I had at Disney. It was noon and the sun was beating down on my pale skin. My family had just arrived at The Crystal Palace for our lunch reservations. I was super excited because 1.) Winnie the Pooh was in there giving autographs and 2.) it was a much talked about buffet. While I waited outside I noticed a fat lady scooting her way up the ramp to the front door. She parked her scooter, got a table, and got up several times to refill her plate WITH HER LEGS. She must have travelled 3 quarters of the park just in the restaurant alone. She definitely didn’t need a scooter. However, give her a few years of that behavior and then she’ll fall in with the #5 crowd. I’ll tell you right now, once you sit down in one of those things it’s extremely tough to get out of it. I mean that both physically and mentally.
So, what can we do to prevent a future filled with voluntary paralysis? I mean this is your future! No pun intended, but we need to take a stand. Forget occupy wall street, we need to occupy the street. That’s fine and dandy for making sure we don’t become fat ourselves but there are weaker humans who will succumb to a life of constant sitting. How do we discourage this behavior? Back in the day there was this tactic known as bullying and it worked really well. Once upon a time I was a super big dork. I sported a huge part, wore cargo pants everywhere, and talked about super boring, irrelevant things. Criticism goes a long way. Criticism and the examples of others. Seriously though – fat people need to know it’s not ok. No more blaming “factors being our control.” It’s time that pudgy finger pointed in the right direction – pressed firmly into the man boob of the culprit himself.
